December 6, 2009
“While we are sleeping, angels have conversations with our souls.
I woke once again to my standing date with 3:30am, and proceeded to doze in and out of sleep for the next two hours. Finally at 5:30am I found myself in that foggy state between sleep and awake and realized I had been dreaming. I thought it was something about Cain, though couldn’t recall details with any sense of certainty or clarity. I had been hoping for the past 3 weeks that he might visit me in this way, and tears developed as I reached into the far corners of my brain, willing myself to remember any portion of what I had dreamt. Was he really there or was my mind recreating my dream from what it was to what I wanted it to be? Was the cloudiness of my mind playing tricks on me?
Later, around 8:00am, the mailman left a fresh set of footprints in the snow that followed him down the front walkway and back to his truck. Odd that he was here, as today was Sunday. He left a small package propped against the front door and the label told me right away it was from CSU. The package contained a book called “Dog Heaven” by Cynthia Rylant. With tears in my eyes, I read through the book, dotted with caring notes that several people from CSU and Argus so thoughtfully left on its pages. A beautiful book full of wonderful sentiments and love.
The following excerpt is from the book and caused me to think some more. “So sometimes an angel will walk a dog back to Earth for a little visit and quietly, invisibly, the dog will sniff about his old backyard, will investigate the cat next door, will follow the child to school, will sit on the front porch and wait for the mail.”
Maybe I did have a dream about Cain; maybe I didn’t. For now I like to think that he walked with an angel while I slept, and spent a quiet visit that left a shadow of his presence on my heart.